Military Divorce · Virginia

Adultery in the Ranks: When an Affair Threatens Your Marriage and Military Career

By Alisa Chunephisal, Esq. · Founding Partner

In any Virginia divorce, adultery carries weight. In a military divorce, it can carry two kinds at once. Beyond its effect on the divorce itself, an affair can become a matter of military discipline under the code that governs servicemembers. That double exposure changes how these cases are handled, because what helps in the courtroom can do real damage to a career, and the two cannot be weighed in isolation.

Adultery in a Virginia divorce

Virginia still recognizes fault grounds for divorce, and adultery is one of them. It can affect the case in concrete ways. Most pointedly, a spouse who committed adultery can be barred from receiving spousal support, also called alimony, unless denying it would be a clear injustice given the parties' situations. That makes adultery one of the few fault issues with a direct dollar consequence.

Proving adultery in Virginia takes more than suspicion. The standard of proof is high, and the evidence has to be clear. That difficulty cuts both ways, protecting against loose accusations while making genuine claims worth documenting carefully. For how spousal support is decided in Virginia, see our spousal support page.

The military dimension under the UCMJ

For a servicemember, an affair is not only a private matter. The Uniformed Code of Military Justice, the body of law that governs members of the armed forces, can treat certain extramarital conduct as a punishable offense, particularly where it harms good order and discipline or brings discredit on the service. The consequences can reach a member's rank, pay, and career.

This is where a military divorce diverges sharply from a civilian one. Raising adultery to gain an edge in the divorce can, in some circumstances, expose a servicemember spouse, or even draw scrutiny that no one intended. The strategy has to account for the career stakes, not just the divorce stakes.

Handling both systems at once

Because the same facts live in two systems, these cases call for care on both fronts. We weigh how a fault claim plays in the divorce against how it may land in the military context, and we counsel clients on the full set of consequences before anyone makes an allegation a centerpiece. The aim is a result that protects you across the board, not a courtroom point that costs you a career. For the federal rules that shape a military case, see our military divorce page, and for the divorce process overall, our divorce practice page.

"In a military divorce, the same affair lives in two systems. You cannot plan for one and ignore the other."

Alisa Chunephisal, Esq. Founding Partner

Honest counsel: weigh the career, not just the case

Adultery is one of the few issues where I slow a client down before they act. In a civilian divorce, a fault claim is weighed against support and little else. In a military divorce, the same conduct can reach a career under military law, and that raises the stakes for everyone involved. So before anyone builds the case around an affair, we map the consequences on both sides, the divorce and the service. Sometimes the smart move is to press it. Sometimes it is not. Either way, it is a decision made with eyes open, not a reflex.

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